Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, but these are old bits. Perhaps not old
to the FoRK list, but I know I saw them last year (at least).
One of my old favorites, "'Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period
preceding the annual Yuletide celebration, ...", is all over the place, like
http://www.mit.edu:8001/afs/athena.mit.edu/user/a/v/avondale/Humor/ChristmasHumor/HTML/TechnicalXmas.html
but they all have the attribution incorrect. I first saw it about 20 years
ago, and I believe it was by Charles McCabe of the SF Chronicle. It certainly
wasn't by "someone in the government", as most of them have it.
There're also Bill Hancock's old bits at ftp://ds.internic.net/rfc/rfc1882.txt
which are fun.
To enhance someone's usual feelings of emptiness at this most material time
of year (at its worst), check out the http://www.virtualpresents.com/ site.
http://www.pcola.gulf.net/~kate/christmas.html has a buncha stuff. And,
http://www.holidayfun.com/ has some cute gifs. So far, though, I'd have to say
that Paradigm Productions' page http://www.2dimes.com/christmas.htm has to
take the (fruit)cake for most diverse page. It's got links to other places
that cover the gamut from straight quotes from the Bible to The X-(mas)Files.
I especially liked "The Real Hubble Space Telescope Image of the Face on Mars".
http://christmas.com/xmas.files/4016.html
Cheers,
Wayne