Re: There They Go, Bad-Mouthing Divorce Again

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Date: Tue Sep 12 2000 - 13:45:37 PDT

On Tue, 12 Sep 2000, B.K. DeLong wrote:
> Speaking of "scaring the crap out of..." while I am in a wonderful marriage
> right now and want kids in a few years....I have absolutely no clue how I'm
> going to fit them in.

You'll either give up something, or you won't. Which leads to...

> I have a wonderful, flexible job....a decent house
> but I still can barely find time for the things that need to get done. And
> with kids it's going to get 10 times as worse? And I'm potentially going to
> lose a big chunk or "me" time which already hardly exists.

Selfish, selfish. Having kids is (for 18 years or so) just like a
marriage, except with more commitment legally, less choice past the
initial decision. So, if marriage requires 100%/100% devotion, guess
what - you'll be giving it all, or you'll be doing it wrong. According
to the marriage advocates on FoRK, at least.

Of course, that'll be interesting with giving 100% to both your spouse
AND every one of your spawn, hmm?

> I'm beginning to wonder how parents do it without their children
> being absolutely undeveloped and psycho.

What the heck makes you think they do? What the heck makes you think
your parents did or their parents did? Look at the current state of
sanity and our civilization.

I'll agree the discussion is about fruitless - go ahead, roll your dice,
see if you're one of the lucky 3%ers. Then dice again to see if your kids
turn out to be 3%ers. But the debate devolves into the sci-fi Heinlein
(Imagine what our neurotic/psychotic/ sociopathic mess will look like to
behavioural and anthropological studies of the far distant future... if
the future is full of free-loving hippies) or nihilistic abandon, or
wide-eyed optimism and Hallmark sentiment.

If I gave more than half an ounce of curiosity, I'd set up a FoRKpoll
somewhere to register divorce rate in this community, this community's
parents, and the marriage aspirations of this community as well.


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