Re: There They Go, Bad-Mouthing Divorce Again

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Date: Tue Sep 12 2000 - 06:55:31 PDT

On Tue, 12 Sep 2000, Adam Rifkin wrote:
> Hey Dan, wanna see my backbone? \me sets flamethrower to extra crispy...

Heyhey, FoRK flamewar. Count me in.

I Find Karma lit into DanKohn with:
> What do you like to do besides cheerlead for divorce? Go down to the
> orphanages and tell children they're better off without parents?

"What are you going to do for an encore? Anally rape my mother while
pouring sugar in my gas tank?"
(name that movie scoring: 5 points if you
are under 28 years old, 30 points otherwise)

> > Americans born since mid-century marry for the same reason they do
> > anything else - to be happy.
> If you think the reason any person gets married is for his or her own
> personal happiness rather than for the combination of the happinesses of
> the spouses (spice?) *and* the children, then it's no wonder marriage
> will never satisfy you.

If you think most people are more interested in the happiness of others
than their own personal happiness, watch your back. Or don't since
they're all watching it for you: let's see what happens. Why doesn't the
3% rule apply to idyllic marriages? Have you been reading the divorce
statistics in the last couple decades? Provide an alternate hypothesis as
to why the divorce rate is so high, Adam.

This is not to say marriage = bad. Only 3% of dotcoms succeed (or less),
and it don't stop anyone from trying over and over again, reaching for
the brass ring. I got nothing against trying for it in marriage, too.
Just don't expect to hit it on the first grab... unless you're all about
your due diligence and you work reeeeeeally hard. And get lucky.

Side Note: "first mover advantage" - is it significant anymore when
trying to find a mate? Is there a "Second mover advantage"?

> > ...with the overriding goal of being happy for all your adult life...
> Perhaps humans weren't meant to be happy for all of their adult lives.
> Perhaps sadness and suffering help people create art and science and
> music and poetry, and give them the empathy needed to relate to one
> another better.

"Yes Junior, I wanted to be a better poet, that's why I married your
mother. I think the depth of my daily misery really shines through and
turns otherwise wailing quatrains into true art."

(Adam started it, mom)

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