> From owner-zone-list@xor.com Fri Aug 15 10:51:23 1997
> To: zone-list@internet-plaza.net
> Reply-To: zonelist@internet-plaza.net
> Subject: Mr. Cranky savages "Good Burger"
> Sender: owner-zone-list@internet-plaza.net
>
>
> -----------------------------------------------------------
> Mr. Cranky savages "Good Burger"
> -----------------------------------------------------------
> Mr. Cranky's other new movie reviews this week include:
> Cop Land...............................(3 bombs)
> Event Horizon..........................(3 bombs)
> In the Company of Men..................(2 bombs)
> Shall We Dance?........................(2 bombs)
>
> Mr. Cranky's new rental reviews this week include:
> Crash.......................................(2 bombs)
> The Devil's Own.............................(3 bombs)
> Everyone Says I Love You....................(2 bombs)
> Lost Highway................................(3 bombs)
> Prisoner of the Mountains...................(2 bombs)
> Shadow Conspiracy...........................(4 bombs)
> Waiting for Guffman.........................(3 bombs)
>
> You'll find them in the Mr. Cranky site
> on the Internet Plaza:
> http://internet-plaza.net/
> -----------------------------------------------------------
> FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR!
> Mr. Cranky is sponsored this week by:
> aXXess Hosting Services
> Dual T3 Web hosting from $95/month
> http://www.xor.com/it/
> -----------------------------------------------------------
> "Good Burger"
> Mr. Cranky's rating: 1 bomb
>
> Historians have come to a general consensus about
> which creations constitute the pinnacle of human creative
> achievement: Michelangelo's David, Da Vinci's Mona Lisa,
> Shakespeare's Hamlet. Few of us are fortunate enough to
> live in a time where an artist finally masters his medium
> and creates a work of such inspiring, enduring brilliance
> that its light shines across the ages. Now, however, ours
> will be remembered as the age when film finally found its
> champion. The debate which once raged about the relative
> merits of Citizen Kane vs. Casablanca can now fall silent:
> As the end of the twentieth century nears, Good Burger has
> achieved cinematic perfection.
>
> The story of Ed (Kel Mitchell) and Dexter (Kenan Thompson)
> and how they rescue the Good Burger restaurant from
> destruction at the hands of the domineering Mondo Burger
> is more than just the story of warriors battling the
> onslaught of corporate tyranny; it is a metaphor for the
> transcendence of the human spirit. Like our Homeric heroes
> Ed and Dexter, each of us must struggle to find a place in
> the universe -- only then can we truly be free.
>
> As Ed, Kel Mitchell delivers an interpretation of
> mentally-challenged existence that is so powerful that
> actors across the country will likely observe a moment of
> awestruck silence when Mitchell accepts his Academy Award
> for Best Actor in March. Brian Robbins is sure to get the
> nod as Best Director for evolving the medium to unprecedented
> levels . And not since Henry Fonda won for "On Golden Pond,"
> has an actor nearing death deserved a nomination more than
> Abe Vigoda. Who but Vigoda could deliver lines like "I think
> I broke my ass" with such indomitable spirit? His portrait of
> proud Otis, the aging fast food employee, is both complex
> and compelling -- and a powerful comment on the plight of
> geriatrics everywhere.
>
> In fact "Good Burger" is so stirring, it was as if director
> Brian Robbins had reached into my body and poured a little
> bit of wonder into my soul. His masterful skills in telling
> this epic of survival and hope reduced the audience to
> stunned silence; many, including this reviewer, wept openly.
>
> -----------------------------------------------------------
> Mr. Cranky's Rating Scale:
> One bomb........Almost tolerable.
> Two bombs.......Consistently annoying.
> Three bombs.....Will require therapy after viewing.
> Four bombs......As good as a poke in the eye with a sharp
> stick.
> Dynamite........So godawful that it ruptured the very
> fabric of space and time with the sheer
> overpowering force of its mediocrity
> (special instances only).
> -----------------------------------------------------------
> This mailing is sent exclusively to those sage souls who
> have chosen to subscribe to the Mr. Cranky mailing
> list. If you'd like to unsubscribe because such e-mails
> aggravate your current lactose intolerance, simply e-mail
> zone-list-request@internet-plaza.net and include the word
> "unsubscribe" as the text of your message.
>
----
adam@cs.caltech.edu
Please could you stop the noise, I'm trying to get some rest
When I am king you will be first against the wall
With your opinions which are of no consequence at all.
Ambition makes you look very ugly.
-- Radiohead, "Paranoid Android" (great album, btw)