Floridian Rhapsody

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From: Tony Berkman (tberkman@rcn.com)
Date: Fri Dec 01 2000 - 17:36:33 PST


I apologize if these are old bytes...

FLORIDIAN RHAPSODY

> To the tune of Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody"...
>
> > Is this the real vote? Is this just fantasy?
> > No Bush or Gore landslide, so we're mired in
> legalities
> > Almost a tie, both sides tell their lies with
> such ease . . .
>
> > Bush:
> > I'm just a rich boy, I need no sympathy
> > Because I'm easy come, easy go
> > I dropped the booze, dropped the blow
> > Anyway the vote goes doesn't really matter, to
> me, to me....
>
> > Mama, just love this ranch
> > Stocked my pond with fresh new bass
> > How I love the upper class!
> > Mama, life is such good fun
> > But now they're trying to take it all away!
> > Mama, oooh, didn't mean to run for prez
> > But you know I always do what daddy sez
> > I'll carry on, carry on, as if nothing really
> matters...
>
> > Gore:
> > Too late, my campaign's done, but I'm still
> working all the time
> > Poaching votes is not a crime!
> > Goodbye, everybody--no wait, I just can't go!
> > Let's count the chads and never ever face the
> truth
> > Bush:
> > Mama, ooooo, (any way the wind blows) I don't
> mean to bitch
> > Sometimes I wish I'd never been born so rich
>
> > Guitar solo, then bouncy piano interlude
>
> > Gore:
> > I see a little silhouetto of a chad
>
> > Chorus:
> > You're a mooch, you're a mooch, will you do the
> recount tango?
> > Pregnant chads, backbiting -- very very
> frightening to see!
> > Broward County, Palm Beach County
> > Broward County, Palm Beach County
> > Broward County, Volusia County,
> Tallahassee-oh-oh-oh!
>
> > Bush:
> > I'm just a rich boy, nobody loves me
> > Chorus:
> > He's just a rich boy from a rich family
> > They treat the White House like a Bush legacy!
> > Gore:
> > He's so dumb, I'm the one, will you give me
> votes?
>
> > Chorus (Republicans only):
> > Be still you wonk! You cannot have the votes!
> > Gore: Give me votes!
> > Be still you -- You cannot have the votes!
> > Gore: Give me votes!
> > Be still you -- You cannot have the votes!
> > Gore: Oh give me vooo-o-o-otes!
> > Chorus: No no no no no!
>
> > Bush:
> > Oh mama mia, mama mia! Mama mia keep my votes!
> > Chorus:
> > Beelzebub has a butterfly ballot for thee, for
> thee, for thee . . . .
>
> > Rockin' guitar solo
>
> > Gore:
> > So you think you can beat me on the very first
> try?
> > So you think the recounts can't be done on the
> sly?
> > Oh Dubya, can't do this to me Dubya
> > We'll just keep counting, till I take the oath
> come next year!
>
> > Rockin' guitar solo gives way to orchestral
> crescendo and then a
> > plaintive piano . . .
> > Chorus:
> > Ooh yeah, ooh yeah, ooh yeah
> > Gore:
> > Nothing really matters, as the country plainly
> sees
> > Bush:
> > Nothing really matters, cuz Al is really just ...
> like ... me
>
> > Chorus:
> > Any way the votes go . . .
> > (Gong)


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