Ron.
>Ron,
>
>My friend Moishe Gertel forwarded these to me. Thought you would enjoy them.
>
>> > JEWISH PERSONAL ADS (These are real ads)
>> > >
>> > > Jewish Princess, 28, seeks successful businessman of any major
>> > > Jewish denomination: hundreds, fifties, twenties. POB 27.
>> > >
>> > > I was reform as an embryo, conservative as a fetus, orthodox from
>> > > birth. Seeking same. POB 46.
>> > >
>> > > Your place or mine? Divorced man, 42, with fleishig dishes only.
>> > > Seeking woman with nice milchig set. Object macaroni. POB 77.
>> > >
>> > > Orthodox woman with get, seeks man who got get, or can get get.
>> > > Get it? I'll show you mine if you show me yours. POB 72.
>> > >
>> > > Desperately seeking shmoozing! Retired senior citizen desires
>> > > female companion 70+ for kvetching, kvelling, krechtzing. Under
>> > > 30 is also OK. POB 64.
>> > >
>> > > Successful orthodox diamond cutter. Both Shea and Yankee
>> > > Stadium. No Shabbos games. Will not mow lawn during s'firah.
>> > > Seeking wife. POB 41.
>> > >
>> > > Matzo supplier, 53, seeks cloth bag manufacturer. Let's play
>> > > "Hide the Afikomen." POB 67
>> > >
>> > > Conservative rabbi, 45, I count women for the minyan and call
>> > > them up to the Torah. Seeking female to make aliyah. POB 50.
>> > >
>> > > Sincere rabbinical student, 27. Enjoys Yom Kippur, Tisha B'av,
>> > > Taanis Esther, Tzom Gedaliah, Asarah B'Teves, Shiva Asar
>> > > B'Tammuz. Seeks companion for living life in the "fast" lane.
>> > > POB 90..
>> > >
>> > > Shul gabbai, 36. I take out the Torah Saturday morning. Would
>> > > like to take you out Saturday night. Please write. POB 81.
>> > >
>> > > Very pretty, slim, lulav would like to meet fragrant, squeezable
>> > > esrog. Let's do hoshanas together. Pitum a must. POB 677.
>> > >
>> > > Attractive Jewish woman, 35, college graduate, seeks successful
>> > > Jewish Prince Charming to get me out of my parents' house. POB
>> > > 843.
>> > >
>> > > Worried about in-law meddling? I'm an orphan! Write. POB 74.
>> > >
>> > > I've had it all: herpes, syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and
>> > > four of the ten plagues. Now I'm ready to settle down. So where
>> > > are all the nice Jewish men hiding? POB 68.
>> > >
>> > > Nice Jewish guy, 38. No skeletons. No baggage. No personality.
>> > > POB 78.
>> > >
>> > > Jewish man, watches TV on Friday night with time clock, eats fish
>> > > at non-kosher restaurants, doesn't wear yarmulke at work. Modern
>> > > Orthodox. POB 98.
>> > >
>> > > Shochet, 54, owns successful butcher shop in Midwest. Doesn't
>> > > believe women should be treated like a piece of meat. Seeks
>> > > glatt kosher maydl for marriage. POB 99.
>> > >
>> > > Divorced Jewish man, seeks partner to attend shule with, light
>> > > Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkah together,
>> > > attend brisses, bar mitzvahs. Religion not important. POB 658.
>> > >
>> > > Jewish businessman, 49, manufactures Sabbath candles,
>> > > Chanukah candles, havdallah candles, Yahrzeit candles. Seeks
>> > > non-smoker.
>> > > POB 787.
>> > >
>> > > Couch potato latke, in search of the right applesauce. Let's try
>> > > it for eight days. Who knows? POB 43.
>> > >
>> > > 80-year-old bubby, no assets, seeks handsome, virile Jewish male,
>> > > under 35. Object matrimony. I can dream, can't I? POB 545.
>> > >
>> > > Jewish male, 34, very successful, smart, independent, self-made.
>> > > Looking for girl whose father will hire me. POB 53.
>> > >
>> > > All my friends are doing it, and quite frankly, I feel left out.
>> > > Jewish woman, 37, never married. Seeks divorce. POB 655.
>>
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